Strength and Resilience
Yuliia Nazarenko, a 33-year-old woman from the city of Sumy, became one of millions of Ukrainian women whose lives were fundamentally changed by the war. Her story is a testament to the unbreakable spirit, the ability to rebuild, and the search for personal freedom despite all challenges.
On the eve of the full-scale invasion, February 23, Yuliia felt a wild, unspeakable sense of anxiety. She sat in the kitchen, crying uncontrollably without understanding why. "It was as if something important was disappearing. As if I hadn't made it. Hadn't lived. Hadn't done it. Hadn't saved," she recalled later, as if having a premonition of the catastrophe. Her husband tried to calm her, promising a new life in Hungary, but Yuliia couldn't settle down, "it was as if something inside already knew everything."
The morning of February 24 confirmed her worst fears. A call from a friend at five in the morning: "Yulia, it's started. The war." Her godmother, who worked in the border service, confirmed: "Yes. If you planned to leave—go right now." In a panic, Yuliia packed her things, begging her husband to go west, and from there to Hungary. But he, seeing the traffic jams on the roads, refused. "And then I understood—that's it. We're stuck. We didn't leave. We stayed, and the chance was gone," she realized with despair.
Trapped in a Village: Fear and Anger
The family found themselves in a village where a cold and persistent anxiety prevailed. The money on her card became inaccessible, and they lived on funds from her mother-in-law, to whom Yuliia is still grateful for the help. Inside Yuliia, fear and anger grew. She saw how other families were fleeing, "Women were evacuating their children, saving themselves," while she was "as if frozen next to a husband who was doing nothing."
One day, when the explosions started again, Yuliia broke down. Sitting in the basement, she begged her husband: "Please, let's go. Anywhere. We need to save ourselves." His silence caused a feeling of powerlessness and terror so strong that she smashed her phone against the wall. "Out of helplessness. Out of horror," she explained. In that moment, Yuliia understood: "He won't protect me. Won't get me out. Won't dare. He is not my support. And I no longer want to be the stone that pulls him down. I want to be myself. And save us myself."
The Path to Freedom: England and New Challenges
All this time, Yuliia continued to work online, teaching English. She dreamed of live practice, "not with a book, but with real people." She dreamed of immersion in the language, of speaking, thinking, and living in English, and most importantly, she wanted her daughter to grow up "without a language barrier. Free." When she saw a story on Instagram from an acquaintance who was already in Great Britain under the "Homes for Ukraine" program, "something clicked in Yuliia: I will try."
She looked for a city that was neither London nor a remote village. Her choice fell on Swindon. After a few days of correspondence and video calls, the visa was obtained in four days. "I'm leaving. With my daughter," she told her husband, who just shrugged. "He was already somewhere else, in his own world, and I was in mine, where I had to save us."
A New Home, New Strength
In England, Yuliia was met with care. The sponsors turned out to be "golden people," providing them with separate rooms and help. However, Yuliia couldn't afford to rest. "I had to work," she realized. She dreamed of working in a school to understand the education system from the inside. Finding a vacancy on the eTeach website, she received an invitation for an interview. "I cried and was afraid," Yuliia recalled, preparing for it as if for an exam. She invented her own story for children—about a boy who thought he couldn't do anything until he tried. This story was about them. After two days of anxious waiting, the headmistress called: "Yulia, you're with us. You're a great girl." Yuliia cried with happiness.
Reality turned out to be difficult. Yuliia understood everything but couldn't speak. Phone calls caused panic, her hands trembled, and her tongue got tied. She was afraid of making a mistake but didn't give up. "Every day I learned. Anew. Myself. The language. Life," she persevered through the difficulties.
Creating Her Own Space and Breaking with the Past
When the sponsorship program was coming to an end, Yuliia faced a new challenge—finding housing. With her salary, the agencies just shrugged. "I searched, wrote, begged. And nothing," she continued her search with desperation. Unexpectedly, a colleague offered help, and Yuliia found a two-room apartment. Although it was empty, Yuliia "created a home with her own hands," buying everything new.
Soon, a new blow came—a letter about the sale of the apartment. "I almost gave up," Yuliia admits. After four months of searching and one viewing, she took an apartment in terrible condition. "I repainted everything myself, washed it, arranged it on the shelves," she said with determination, turning it into a cozy place. "And we live here. Calmly. In cleanliness. In our own space."
All this time, Yuliia was sending money to her husband, who had lost his job. When he announced he had joined the territorial defense, Yuliia understood: "now he will definitely never leave." Although there was a chance at the beginning of the war, he "couldn't. Didn't want to. Didn't dare." A new betrayal came in the form of a photograph of her husband with another woman. Yuliia said nothing, she just filed for divorce online. He received the papers, and since then—no help, no word. "And this is where it hurts. Not for myself—for her," she said, feeling pain for her daughter over his indifference. However, now Yuliia "no longer hurts. I don't care. I no longer ask, don't wait, don't call. I live."
A New Life, a New Yuliia
Now Yuliia runs a blog on Instagram, sharing her life, thoughts on language, and personal experience. Starting in September, she plans to launch her own English course. She is building her personal life, going on dates, looking for someone "with whom it will be real." "I'm no longer a girl who is afraid. I am a woman who has been through everything and didn't break. And now I know for sure: I am in my place. I am here. And I am living," Yuliia confidently declares.
When asked if she wants to return to Ukraine, Yuliia sincerely replies: "No. I don't want to." She emphasizes her love for Ukraine, "It's my land, my language, my roots." But "here, in England, for the first time in my life, I built everything myself. With my own hands. From scratch." She found housing herself, got a job, paid for everything, healed her heart, and raised her child. "I didn't rely on anyone—except myself."
It was here that she understood "what I am capable of." And she no longer wants to give up this inner strength, freedom, and peace. "I am not running from Ukraine. I have simply finally come to myself. Here in England. In my new, real life," Yuliia concludes, embodying the true strength and resilience of a Ukrainian woman.
